Main | Kevin Roberts, Ph. D., The Disability Coach »
Attitude
By coach | March 7, 2007
When one is different, in a way that is regarded by many as negative, something less, it is easy for that one person to also regard himself or herself in a negative manner. Why? Because that person often has no reference point for his or her strengths, positive characteristics and the like. Strengths and positive characteristics can be blessings that have been given us, or virtues we have cultivated in ourselves. That is brains, good looks or decency, empathy and joy in the successes of others as well ourselves. Why is there not a reference point for positive aspects of people? Often, we simply live in cultures that have arranged things that way forever, and I or you just stepped into it, so to speak. Another reason can be that our loved ones want so badly to not have us held back, that they just focus on problems and their solution, and not the strengths we have that are not as obvious. They do that because they fear others will never look closely enough for our strengths, virtues and positiveness and thereby find favor in their hearts for us/me/you. Therein, loved ones can easily and unknowingly conspire to not present a reference point for for positive aspects of their loved ones. Reference point for positive aspects of people that are regarded, on the face of it, as different in some negative fashion.
Everyone would rather be good looking than not so, everyone would rather be gifted with exceptional intelligence than not so, just as most of us would rather have good luck than bad, and fame and fortune rather than being treated poorly and/or indifferently, and, lastly, as Mae West told us, “I have been rich and I have been poor, rich is better.”
But what if you, me, we, us, they, them or I, am not?
Kevin
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